Re: Fallout Equestria: All That Remains

by O. Hinds Thu Mar 14, 2013 11:41 pm

CamoBadger wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:
CamoBadger wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:Is it important for some reasons that they assume but don't know that the pilot is a pegasus?
Yes. It's going to end up being a problem for them later on. (trying not to spoil anything, sorry for lack of detail in some of my posts.)
Hm... Perhaps they overheard "she's a natural flier" or somesuch thing? I'm currently dealing with this using a headcanon-discontinuity (ie, pretending that it didn't actually happen), which doesn't work if the thing that I'm pretending didn't happen is a key component of the story.
I'm sorry about that. And it's not that it's majorly important, it will just show up again later. Again, sorry.

Ah, so the overhead natural flier thing won't work? Nor will any other fix to make it readily sensible? Will an explanation be offered for how it is sensible but not readily, perhaps? Some... odd but plausible quirk of the Remnant's source of intelligence? Anything?

by **CamoBadger** Fri Mar 15, 2013 12:12 am

O. Hinds wrote:
CamoBadger wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:
CamoBadger wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:Is it important for some reasons that they assume but don't know that the pilot is a pegasus?
Yes. It's going to end up being a problem for them later on. (trying not to spoil anything, sorry for lack of detail in some of my posts.)
Hm... Perhaps they overheard "she's a natural flier" or somesuch thing? I'm currently dealing with this using a headcanon-discontinuity (ie, pretending that it didn't actually happen), which doesn't work if the thing that I'm pretending didn't happen is a key component of the story.
I'm sorry about that. And it's not that it's majorly important, it will just show up again later. Again, sorry.
Ah, so the overhead natural flier thing won't work? Nor will any other fix to make it readily sensible? Will an explanation be offered for how it is sensible but not readily, perhaps? Some... odd but plausible quirk of the Remnant's source of intelligence? Anything?

The "natural flier" could actually work pretty well, but I'd feel bad taking someone else's idea and using it like that.

by O. Hinds Fri Mar 15, 2013 12:18 am

CamoBadger wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:
CamoBadger wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:
CamoBadger wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:Is it important for some reasons that they assume but don't know that the pilot is a pegasus?
Yes. It's going to end up being a problem for them later on. (trying not to spoil anything, sorry for lack of detail in some of my posts.)
Hm... Perhaps they overheard "she's a natural flier" or somesuch thing? I'm currently dealing with this using a headcanon-discontinuity (ie, pretending that it didn't actually happen), which doesn't work if the thing that I'm pretending didn't happen is a key component of the story.
I'm sorry about that. And it's not that it's majorly important, it will just show up again later. Again, sorry.
Ah, so the overhead natural flier thing won't work? Nor will any other fix to make it readily sensible? Will an explanation be offered for how it is sensible but not readily, perhaps? Some... odd but plausible quirk of the Remnant's source of intelligence? Anything?
The "natural flier" could actually work pretty well, but I'd feel bad taking someone else's idea and using it like that.

...If we both think that the idea would be good, why is it a problem that I'm suggesting it to you (now upgraded, since you've said that you think it would work, to asking you to use it)?

by **CamoBadger** Fri Mar 15, 2013 12:22 am

Yeah, I'll put it in if you don't mind, it's actually a really good way to explain why they think it's a pegasus.

by O. Hinds Fri Mar 15, 2013 12:33 am

CamoBadger wrote:Yeah, I'll put it in if you don't mind, it's actually a really good way to explain why they think it's a pegasus.

Um. Well, from one point of view, I suppose that I ought to be thanking you for being so dedicated to defending my intellectual property. :) Really, though, it's fine: consider this not only explicit authorization to use this idea but an explicit request to do so.
Even though no one else seems to have actually noticed the problem.

by Kippershy Fri Mar 15, 2013 9:11 am

O. Hinds wrote:Even though no one else seems to have actually noticed the problem.

Until you grow to Project Horizons levels of fame, complexity and length, not many people will care to worry about what's generally seen as a smaller detail as long as the storytelling around it is tight and alright.
I wouldn't say nobody because obviously you count, but it's nearly so.

Most people would rather just enjoy a story than risk ruining the fun of it for themselves by over-thinking it all.

by O. Hinds Fri Mar 15, 2013 11:03 am

Kippershy wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:Even though no one else seems to have actually noticed the problem.
Until you grow to Project Horizons levels of fame, complexity and length, not many people will care to worry about what's generally seen as a smaller detail as long as the storytelling around it is tight and alright.
I wouldn't say nobody because obviously you count, but it's nearly so.

Most people would rather just enjoy a story than risk ruining the fun of it for themselves by over-thinking it all.

Ah, yes, I have heard tell of this "not overthinking" thing. How does it work? :)

by Kippershy Fri Mar 15, 2013 12:56 pm

O. Hinds wrote:
Kippershy wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:Even though no one else seems to have actually noticed the problem.
Until you grow to Project Horizons levels of fame, complexity and length, not many people will care to worry about what's generally seen as a smaller detail as long as the storytelling around it is tight and alright.
I wouldn't say nobody because obviously you count, but it's nearly so.

Most people would rather just enjoy a story than risk ruining the fun of it for themselves by over-thinking it all.
Ah, yes, I have heard tell of this "not overthinking" thing. How does it work? :)

Well Timmy, to stop over thinking things there's three things to remember:
-That your parents loved you. They loved you and took good care of you as a child, you should be grateful and return the favour to them as they get older.
-Your country is the best and you can put your faith in the American Government. The United States of America does what it can for all of its people and we live in a happy country, unlike the U.S.S.R.
-Finally, you need to put your faith into your parents and the government and just not worry about things. Let whatever happens happen and don't question it. That way, you too can be a happy, productive member of society.
Right Jonny?
Right!

So come Timmy, play along with Jonny and be what you need to be, for today, tomorrow and the future!

...hahahaha

by O. Hinds Fri Mar 15, 2013 1:39 pm

Kippershy wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:
Kippershy wrote:
O. Hinds wrote:Even though no one else seems to have actually noticed the problem.
Until you grow to Project Horizons levels of fame, complexity and length, not many people will care to worry about what's generally seen as a smaller detail as long as the storytelling around it is tight and alright.
I wouldn't say nobody because obviously you count, but it's nearly so.

Most people would rather just enjoy a story than risk ruining the fun of it for themselves by over-thinking it all.
Ah, yes, I have heard tell of this "not overthinking" thing. How does it work? :)

Well Timmy, to stop over thinking things there's three things to remember:
-That your parents loved you. They loved you and took good care of you as a child, you should be grateful and return the favour to them as they get older.
-Your country is the best and you can put your faith in the American Government. The United States of America does what it can for all of its people and we live in a happy country, unlike the U.S.S.R.
-Finally, you need to put your faith into your parents and the government and just not worry about things. Let whatever happens happen and don't question it. That way, you too can be a happy, productive member of society.
Right Jonny?
Right!

So come Timmy, play along with Jonny and be what you need to be, for today, tomorrow and the future!

...hahahaha

:)

by Kippershy Fri Mar 15, 2013 1:49 pm

I hope you got that 50's informertial vibe I intended for there

by O. Hinds Fri Mar 15, 2013 3:18 pm

Kippershy wrote:I hope you got that 50's informertial vibe I intended for there

Aye.

by **CamoBadger** Fri Mar 15, 2013 3:41 pm

swicked wrote:Finished the second chapter, will post comments later, but I was a bit curious about the stuff in the first.

Camo, you really built up a history of abuse. Degrees of exceptance, coping mechanisms, the works. Did you research this stuff? You really invested a lot of pages to it.

Thanks, I'm glad you liked it.

I did do a little bit of research, but it was helped by my sociology class. We had about 2 weeks where we did reading and class work about rape victims, their coping mechanisms, thought processes, etc. I'm glad it helped Twilight Sparkle

by Kippershy Fri Mar 15, 2013 4:39 pm

@Swicked
I thought it was implied Blackjack grabbed his junk, not his flank...
I mean, I know it's off topic for here, but that's what I took from the incident in the dog tunnel if that's what you're referring to.

by **CamoBadger** Fri Mar 15, 2013 5:33 pm

Thanks! I'm glad you're enjoying it Lyra

by Kippershy Fri Mar 15, 2013 5:53 pm

swicked wrote:I remember it being that he was going to fall or trip a trap and she grabbed him my the haunches and pulled him back, but my memery is crap so whatever.

Finished 3; this is pretty entertaining :)

Nah, I'm pretty sure he goes to step on one. I dunno though. Doesn't really matter.

by Ketchup Fri Mar 15, 2013 5:54 pm

swicked wrote:I remember it being that he was going to fall or trip a trap and she grabbed him my the haunches and pulled him back, but my memery is crap so whatever.

That's what I remember, I've read that chapter more than most of them.

by **CamoBadger** Fri Mar 15, 2013 7:17 pm

Thanks swicked, I'm glad it's enjoyable Twilight Sparkle

And thanks for the recommendations and fixes, I really appreciate it.

by Ketchup Fri Mar 15, 2013 8:51 pm

Went stumbling about Wikipedia reading about battles during WW2 on the Eastern Front and I ended up finding out what a 'Triarii' is.

I love the internet.

by O. Hinds Sat Mar 16, 2013 5:31 pm

CamoBadger, you will, of course, be wanting to read the revised Vitiosus scene when it's up; there's one bit that I'm hoping won't cause trouble for you.

by **CamoBadger** Sat Mar 16, 2013 5:41 pm

Yeah, I'll definitely be taking a look at it when it's finished being revised.

by O. Hinds Sat Mar 16, 2013 9:32 pm

The revisions to Chapter 54 are live.

by **CamoBadger** Sat Mar 16, 2013 10:07 pm

Hm, interesting.

Spoiler:

by O. Hinds Sat Mar 16, 2013 11:03 pm

CamoBadger wrote:Hm, interesting.
Spoiler:

Aye; I didn't have much of a problem with the old version, but I think that the new one is much better.

Spoiler:

by **CamoBadger** Sat Mar 16, 2013 11:19 pm

Spoiler:

by **CamoBadger** Wed Mar 20, 2013 4:10 pm

The new chapter is fully written. I'll finish editing/revising/brushing after class and release it this evening. Twilight Sparkle

by Kippershy Wed Mar 20, 2013 4:16 pm

Nice, keep up the good work. Wish I had it in me to write as fast as you are right now.

by **CamoBadger** Wed Mar 20, 2013 4:19 pm

This isn't very common for me. I usually end up with big gaps between chapter (like the 1 month gap between ch.10 and ch.11), I've just been practicing a few of the tricks my teacher suggested. Turns out they do work pretty well.

by Kippershy Wed Mar 20, 2013 4:23 pm

Oh? Tricks eh? What kind?

by **CamoBadger** Wed Mar 20, 2013 4:31 pm

There's quite a few.

- Go on walks to clear your mind and dream yourself into your character.

- Try to be your character. Know every aspect of them, even if it doesn't actually fit the story. What would they do at a party? What kind of lover are they? What do they think about random current events? stuff like that.

- Find a place and time where you won't be distracted. Disconnect the internet if you have to (unless you use it for music), silence your phone, etc. For me, I do good near the end of the day usually. Once I have everything done that needs to be done and I don't have to worry about anything else, I can write easier. Sometimes this applies to mornings that I have free, but not very often.

- Daydream if you can. Those times where you don't have anything to do and can't think of something to do, just sit back and dream. Try to lead it toward your character's situation, and you'll be surprised how quickly motivation shows up. This one works best for me if I read through the last page or two of what I wrote, then sit back and dream of what the character would do next, what would happen because of what they did, what would try to stop them, what happens while they're doing what they do, etc.

Yeah, these are the ones I use.

by Kippershy Wed Mar 20, 2013 4:37 pm

Well damn, that's not a lot different from what I do.. ish.
Spoilered so I don't shit up your thread as much. You might laugh at it though.

Spoiler:

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