Cloudsville
Welcome to Cloudsville. If you're new, don't forget to sign up and say hi in the Introduction forum.

Join the forum, it's quick and easy

Cloudsville
Welcome to Cloudsville. If you're new, don't forget to sign up and say hi in the Introduction forum.
Cloudsville
Would you like to react to this message? Create an account in a few clicks or log in to continue.

A Blank Canvas

2 posters

Go down

A Blank Canvas Empty A Blank Canvas

Post by Moonlight Wed Jan 11, 2012 8:25 pm

So I finally decided to try my hoof at writing more seriously. This is just the first chapter, and it's only an idea so far. Please rate and criticize and tell me what you think.

A Blank Canvas

Setting the Scene

Just as on any other day, the pegasus woke up, wiping the grog from his eyes and fixing the feathers on his wings. He slumped to the floor from his tidied bed and stretched his legs in order to wake himself up a little more. After a few minutes of standing there deciding his morningly course of actions, he left his bedroom and made his way down the hall to the bathroom. 

Upon entry, he immediately saw a pegasus looking straight at him, white, tallish, and relatively thin with a longish blue mane atop his head and a shortish blue tail upon his flank. He bore the cutie mark of a metallic pencil. From what he saw, he fixed his own hair a tad and turned away from the mirror, and towards the sink where he proceeded to wash his face and teeth.

After this, he left the room and backtracked to his bedroom to pick up his satchel and put his personal things inside, tucking the satchel away underneath his wing. He had always preferred satchels to saddlebags, as they are not nearly as restricting to a pegasus' use of his wings. Inside were a few notebooks, some drawing equipment, a letter or two, his finances, and some traveling equipment.

Leaving his bedroom, he made his way downstairs to the main attraction of the art shop in which he lived; the actual shop part. He said farewell to the owners and thanked them again for letting him live there, to which Mr. and Mrs. Pallet smiled and nodded the pegasus on his way.

Today was no ordinary day for him. Today was the day he'd been waiting for months for. It was the day he would finally be leaving Ponyville for a small, secluded village called Darkwood, where he would work alongside the highly renowned artist known as Canvas. This mare is accredited with many designs in the marketing world, works of art that hang in the Canterlot museum, and even for designing most of the recent additions to Canterlot's stained glass collection.

Now, Darkwood was located west of Ponyville, on the other side of the Everfree Forest. The pegasus, however, had arrangements to travel overhead via cloud, remaining safe from most of the Everfree's dangers, and cutting travel time by at least two days of normal flying, as well as allowing mid-flight rest, conserving energy and serving as a kind of floating bed when he would need it.

A few of Ponyville's resident ponies said goodbye to their mysterious, but long standing friend as he walked through the streets, though Pallet's Art Parlor's apprentice worker was, for the most part, relatively unknown. The pegasus now stood at the edge of the forest, awaiting his delivery. All unscheduled clouds overhead had to be ordered in advanced and a valid reason had to be given and to say the least, there were many regulations to the process. It wasn't always that way, but ever since a unicorn by the name of Rarity almost ruined winter, they became far more strict in what excess products were made in Cloudsdale, in case such an event would happen again. 

So there the pony stood, awaiting his humble yet effective means of travel.


Last edited by Shadefire on Wed Jan 25, 2012 5:15 pm; edited 1 time in total
Moonlight
Moonlight
Hydra

Posts : 650
Brohoof! : 23
Join date : 2011-11-27
Age : 27
Location : New York State (not the city)

Character List:
Name:
Sex:
Species:

Back to top Go down

A Blank Canvas Empty Re: A Blank Canvas

Post by Moonlight Wed Jan 25, 2012 5:11 pm

Finally decided to finish Chapter 2. It would be easier to write these if there was any response, but oh well. Also, an edit near the end of Ch1.

Moonlit Ride

The pegasus had been sitting there for fifteen minutes with nopony in sight, so in an effort to pass time, he started sketching the surrounding landscape. He started in the direction of the forest, and began working. An evergreen here, an oak there, a maple deeper in, and marigolds at many trunks. So engrossed in his work was the pegasus that he neglected to realize two things. First was that he has been there for a number of hours now, and second was that a grey pegasus with a yellow mane had been watching him from atop a nearby parked cloud for about half the time he'd been drawing.

"Wow, you're really good!" exclaimed the grey pegasus, suddenly.

Turning, the white pegasus laid his deep green eyes upon the local mailpony,  a mare known as Derpy Hooves. 

"Um. Thanks! I think." The white pegasus noticed by the sky that it was already past noon, and then looking back upon Derpy, he asked, "So are you here about my delivery?"

"Yessir, I am!" she replied. "Just sign your name here."
She passed him a clipboard, almost dropping it and falling in the process, with the details of his order, and on the indicated line, he signed  "Ocean".

"Thanks," said Ocean, passing the clipboard back to Derpy, who had fallen, clumsily, off the cloud, while the white Pegasus was signing.

So, Ocean gathered his things into his bag, while the grey pegasus regained her wits, standing up and almost falling again. The stallion thanked Derpy for her services again as he flapped once, leaping onto the cloud parked a few feet above the ground.

"Safe travels!" yelled the mare from below, while Ocean flapped his wings to make the cloud ascend. Nodding graciously down at the mare, he cleared the top surface of the Everfree. With one slow flap after another of his wings, he propelled himself eastward, above the treetops, wary of what may linger below.

And so he continued, until he had been floating eastward for a number of hours. Ponyville was now out of sight, and the sun had gone down, allowing the moon to rise in its place. Ocean was getting weary by now, and decided that he would sleep.

With the plush comfort of the cloud beneath his belly, he quickly drifted off into sleep, unaware of the events that would transpire when he woke up.
Moonlight
Moonlight
Hydra

Posts : 650
Brohoof! : 23
Join date : 2011-11-27
Age : 27
Location : New York State (not the city)

Character List:
Name:
Sex:
Species:

Back to top Go down

A Blank Canvas Empty Re: A Blank Canvas

Post by CamoBadger Thu Jan 26, 2012 12:47 am

Cliffhangers XD
I like it, I want moar please!
CamoBadger
CamoBadger
Royal Alicorn

Posts : 13890
Brohoof! : 588
Join date : 2011-11-29

Back to top Go down

A Blank Canvas Empty Re: A Blank Canvas

Post by Moonlight Fri Jan 27, 2012 2:41 am

You asked for moar, and moar you shall have! Chapter 3 is longer than the other two, and has moar Derpy! Enjoy!

Going Away Party

Ocean had barely been asleep for an hour, when he was awakened by a familiar voice. Confused and tired, he looked towards the source of the noise to see the grey pegasus from earlier, flying as fast as she could toward him with a tilt in her trajectory. Her eyes were squinted to keep them from drying out, but it was clear that her pupils were facing different directions entirely. In her mouth, was a pink envelope, past which she yelled, "I allmossht forgossht yoo hash mmail!"

Utterly startled, Ocean yelled "Derpy, no!" She was flying toward him far too quickly, and sure enough, collided with him. The force of the collision dissipated the cloud from underneath the stallion, and neither could flap properly enough with their clashed bodies in order to stop themselves from falling. So it came to pass that the two crashed through trees, ending up strewn across the floor of the forest below.

When they each regained their wits, Ocean quickly realized that one of his wings was broken. Understanding that Derpy is a chronic clutz, Ocean thought better than to blame her, but began to panic nonetheless.

Just as he was starting to explain to her that they were both doomed, she stopped him, passing him the pink envelope and insisting that he read it. Dumbstruck and confused, he took the envelope, carefully opening it, only to have his ears assaulted by the sound of kazoos, and confetti lodging itself in his mane. After recovering from the shock which nearly gave him a heart attack, he began to read the letter within, under the dim light provided by the moon through the trees. Just as he expected, a farewell card from Pinkie Pie. It read as follows.

"Dear Ocean,
It makes me super extra duper sad that we couldn't throw a goodbye party for you because of your tight schedule, so I decided to write you this card so that you  know that we'll all miss you and we wish you the best of luck in Darkwood! I would give you this letter personally, but between birthdays, work, and babysitting the Cake's twins, I've been so busy that I couldn't and so I sent it with the mailpony to give to you from me! Remember us when you're a famous artíst, and we'll have an official party waiting for you should you decide to come back and visit!
Love, 
Pinkie!"

After finishing the card, Ocean let out a heavy sigh. He was now behind schedule, in one of the most dangerous areas of Equestria,and unable to fly, all for a Farewell from Pinkie Pie card. A sharp pain extending from his side reminded him that he had to tend to his broken wing.

Reaching into his satchel, he pulled out a length of gauze tape, which he had Derpy help wrap around one wing and under his belly. He then addressed the mare herself, asking "Are you alright? Can you still fly?"

Derpy stretched her limbs and wings, checking for any pain, and seeing nothing more than a bruise or two, she tried her wings at flying. A success. "Don't worry, Ocean, I can help!" she stated triumphantly. She flew up toward the treetops to see how she could help get him back in the air, but the willow trees would intertwine and block her route up and out each time she tried to go up.

The situation became evidentially clear to Ocean. He was stranded in the middle of the Everfree Forest, at night, with quite possibly the biggest clutz in all of Equestria.

"Sorry Ocean," said the mare, gliding back down toward him, her eyes shifting slightly, almost straightening. She lowered her head. "I just don't know what went wrong..."

"There, there," began the stallion, "I know it was an accident." Derpy perked up a little at this, her eyes regaining their crossed nature as her mood improved. Ocean examined his surroundings, first and foremost analyzing which way was east, so that he might continue his journey. The branches of the willows above looked sinister, as did the smaller plants that grew around, in all sorts of sickly colors. "Best, I think, if we stick together. Only the alicorns know all the malicious creatures that lurk in this forest, and there's more safety in numbers, after all."

Derpy nodded in agreement, eying multiple aspects of their surroundings at once. Meanwhile, as though proving the weight of the pegasus' words, the branches above their heads shifted, rustling leaves all around them.
Moonlight
Moonlight
Hydra

Posts : 650
Brohoof! : 23
Join date : 2011-11-27
Age : 27
Location : New York State (not the city)

Character List:
Name:
Sex:
Species:

Back to top Go down

A Blank Canvas Empty Re: A Blank Canvas

Post by Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum